I finally upgraded my iPod. I've been needing more space for ages, but when the Classic came out it had user interface issues (stutters) and the price point for the 160GB version was a tad high. I played with one of the new 120GBs, though, and they fixed both the stutter and the price point, so I bought. This iPod has built-in Genius playlist building. I thought that would be fun to play with. It went like this...
Me: "OK, let's see what you've got. I figure if I start with 'Escape (The Pina Colada Song)' you should hit Jimmy Buffet within 3 songs. Go"
iPod: "Steve Miller Band - The Joker"
Me: "That works."
iPod: "Gary Wright - Dream Weaver"
Me: "Umm, OK."
iPod: "Jimmy Buffett - Margaritaville"
Me: "There it is. Well done."
iPod: "Joan Jett & The Blackhearts - I Love Rock and Roll"
Me: "What? That's not even close. Are you insane?"
iPod: "Me insane? You're the one having a conversation with an iPod."
Me: "Bite me. New genre. Coal Chamber - Fiend. Go."
iPod: "Korn - Wake Up Hate, then Kittie - In Winter, then Dope's cover of You Spin Me 'Round."
Me: "Whoa. That last one I never would have thought of, but it totally works. Well done."
iPod: "Well, I am a Genius."
Me: "OK Genius, try this. Jocelyn Pook - Masked Ball."
iPod: "WTF is that?"
Me: "It's that really cool dark brooding music from the masked ball in Eyes Wide Shut."
iPod: "Like that helps. You do know that I don't watch movies, right? Anyway, not only does it not sound like anything else in your collection, I don't think it sounds like anything else period. So here, have a list of completely random songs."
Me: "Sigh. OK, another new genre. The Crystal Method - Murder. Go."
iPod: "Leftfield - Song of Life, then Propellerheads - Bang On!, the Goldfrapp - Hairy Trees."
Me: "Nicely done."
Me: "Another new genre. In-Grid - Pour Toujours. Go"
iPod: "French electronic? Seriously?"
Me: "Why are you being judgemental?"
iPod: "I'm not. You do know that you are having this conversation with yourself, right? Anyway, how about Bond - Hungarian, then Bond - Samba, then Aurora - Real Life."
Me: "OK, that works, I guess. But do you have something against French music or something? Edith Piaf - L' Homme A La Moto. Go."
iPod: "Genius is unavailable for the selected song."
Me: "Ha! Got you. At least that's better than random songs. OK, let's try something different. Alien Ant Farm's cover of Smooth Criminal. Go."
iPod: "OK, how about System of a Down - Chop Suey!, then Disturbed - Land of Confusion, then Dead or Alive - You Spin Me 'Round."
Me: "Another cover of You Spin Me 'Round? It works I guess, but why?"
iPod: "Why? It's your music, Bub."
Me: "Sigh. Chris Thile - Stealing Second."
iPod: "Sheryl Crow - Steve McQueen"
Me: "Huh? I give you instrumental bluegrass and you give me Sheryl Crow?"
iPod: "R.E.M. - Rockville"
Me: "Still not even close."
iPod: "Neil Young - Sugar Mountain? The Grateful Dead - Franklin's Tower? Kings of Convenience - I'd Rather Dance With You? You know - it's not my fault if you don't have any similar music."
Me: "I have a dozen instrumental bluegrass albums and a couple dozen instrumental celtic albums that would be way closer than anything you've shown me."
iPod: "Yeah, whatever."
Me: "OK, one more. Yo-Yo Ma - Elgar Cello Concerto."
iPod: "Yo-Yo Ma - Gershwin Prelude #1, then Jian Wang - Suite No 2 in D Minor, then Hayley Westenra - Wuthering Heights."
Me: "The first two are great, the last one though? That's a cover of a Kate Bush song."
iPod: "By a classical musician."
Me: "That's the tie? That's stupid."
Note: The idea of turning this into a conversation with my iPod was totally stolen from Wil Wheaton's twittering.